Why Not Weddings?

Sometimes when I am introduced to a person as an event planner they automatically hear “wedding planner” and start talking about details from their wedding, their friends’ wedding, or ask for advice about an upcoming wedding. They are often taken aback when I tell them that even though as a Certified Meeting Professional I could plan weddings, I do not.

Sure, I have helped some of my friends with their weddings; they were lovely and I enjoyed them very much. However, in the real world, I feel like every event professional who works with weddings is automatically set up for failure. This is someone’s special day. Everyone’s emotions are on high alert, the ground you walk on is unstable, and no matter what decision you make in the moment, you will never please everyone.

I’m sure that there are weddings without drama. Lovely mothers-of-the-bride who agree with each decision their daughters make. Weddings where every item ordered shows up exactly as it looked in the picture. Weddings where the bride’s dress fit her perfectly after only one fitting, everybody’s hair turned out beautifully, and the weather couldn’t have been better. I have not experienced a Utopian wedding before but I’m sure they exist. Somewhere.

The frontlines of events are dangerous enough without adding emotions and unrealistic expectations into the mix. Being the one to make the last-minute decision to move the cocktail hour onto the venue’s patio instead of having it in the ballroom because some random situation came up, will inevitably shock a family member, when in reality you made the best decision with the information you had at the time. These decisions are always made with the bride and groom’s best experience in mind.

For me, the stakes are too high. A bride’s expectations of what this day should look like can be too high. A father’s idea of what a wedding should cost versus reality can be the basis for an uncomfortable conversation or two. A well-meaning family member can seem overly demanding to the venue staff when trying to be helpful. I’m not willing to risk my relationships or reputation on a wedding. Give me a multi-day, city-wide, 7,000-person event with a million logistical details any day of the week.

For those of you who are wedding planners, thank you! You may not hear it enough from your clients, but I deeply appreciate what you do. It takes someone with a special gift to do that job and that fact is not lost on me.

As an event professional, do you plan weddings? I’d love to hear about your experience! You can share it here or send me an email.

Pass this blog on to those you know who plan events, like it, and let’s share our information with each other!