Tidbits for the Un-seasoned Traveler

As “the disease that shall not be named” continues to pass through our memory, more and more people who have never, or have rarely ever traveled, are flying around the country. Visiting grandparents, going to the beach with their families, saying “the heck with it all” and skinny dipping under the pale moonlight. That’s great. Sadly, Emily Post never wrote an etiquette book for the infrequent flyer, and, sadly, these days nobody would take the time to read it. Allow me to impart a few tidbits to help all of us get along on the jetway.

1. There are no cup holders on the plane. If you have brought your big gulp Dr. Pepper with you onto the plane, not only will you have to navigate getting your bag into the overhead bin with it in your hand, you will also have to squeeze into your seat, get your personal item under the seat in front of you, and buckle in.
2. Unless you are flying Southwest, you have an assigned seat. You cannot stop and sit in the first open seat you find. Please take a moment to find your seat number. There is also a seat diagram in the airline app with your seat identified for you. It’s a really handy feature.
3. Rows 25 and above are well after the wing of the plane. There is no need to stop and look at the number for every row starting at the front. Keep on walking please. The faster we all get on and seated, the more likely we can leave on time.
4. The bags go in the overhead bins wheels first. Wheels first. Wheels…..first. This means that the wheels of the bag enter the compartment first which makes sense since you are holding it by the handle to lift it into the bin.
5. You get the seat you are assigned to. No more. I get the seat I am assigned to. Also, no more. We have to share the armrest. We do not have to share leg space or foot space and I’d rather not act as your pillow for the afternoon.
6. We will most likely never meet again. I’m ok with the usual pleasantries when we sit down, but honestly, we don’t need to share the moments of our lives. You are a stranger to me. I don’t want to tell you where I’m from or where I’m going. I will probably make up a story about my family. I travel enough that I either need to get some work done or am in need of some “alone” time.

I say all of this as a public service announcement and out of concern for everyone involved. Flight attendants, gate attendants, security agents, you, and me. If you don’t travel regularly, it really doesn’t hurt to read those “know-before-you-go” emails the airlines send you.

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I have turned the Tidbits for Unseasoned Travelers into a page on my website.
Read all of the helpful insights here!